Tag: Annoying Autobiographical

[ANNOYING AUTO] The State of Cull

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn Annoying Autobiography, Sister SiteLeave a comment

The header image is AI generated.

Last week a God damn mouse nibbled its way through one of my monitors’ power cable. One foot nudge later and I’m down to a single screen. As I’m used to two by this point, I found the situation less than optimal.

Thus the meager funds were depleted for a new one. As I was going spend happy, I bought a new printer. The monitor was to arrive Sunday, the printer near the end of the month.

To my delight, the monitor arrived Saturday. I spent the weekend fiddling with cables until I became sick of fiddling with cables. So I canceled my printer order from one place and made a new one at another. More expensive, but I pick it up tomorrow.

My intent is to hook up the printer and finish with messing with the cables. No doubt more headaches await on that score, but hey! My life.

Once that is done, I’m printing up what I have of the novel’s second draft for my Alpha readers. I’m working more on the second draft. I will finish this bad boy. Hopefully before Spring.

Ha. Ha. Ha.

I have a buffer of two movies for the Sister Site. I have thoughts on one or two more. I need underscore italics bold all caps NEED to write at least one long review. I’m sick of the short ones.

And that’s today’s report. God, it’s good to give a full one.

[SITE RELATED] Yay Milestone?

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn Silly Stuff, Site InformationLeave a comment

So WordPress tells me today I’ve hit a milestone: I’ve past 10,000 all-time views for my main blog. That means, I assume 10,000 people have visited my site.

That’s a nice number… if I was starting out.

See, I’ve been doing this for twenty years. Now assume the number shows individual people and not the same person coming again and again, okay? Had at least one new person visiting this site every day since it’s creation, I would have reached this milestone earlier.

Say sometime before my tenth anniversary.

By this point I’d be at 21,900 views.

Not enough zeros, me thinks.

I’m glad I blog for my own personal pleasure, and not for money. Otherwise, I’d be seriously depressed right now.

Now as I was posting this, I did my usual checking what the AI thought about things. What title it thought I should have, how the post flow and so on. Nothing I planned on using, just curious.

Everything it did made this post more… upbeat. Like it was ignoring the sarcasm.

Best of all, I asked for a possible header image and got this:

I adored this. Not that it in anyway matched what I was saying, but still.

Being me, I thought I could do better. WordPress gave the prompt it used to create the above. And, with a few minor tweaks, I made this header, which I used:

Now to be fully transparent, the AI had two Views written on that sign before I altered it. But I think this suits the post more.

How about you?

[ANNOYING AUTO] Signs of Skynet Awakening?

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn Annoying AutobiographyLeave a comment

We got a new device, an Amazon Echo. To use it, you call out “Alexa”, then give it a command. We use it to turn on and off lights. We can even change the lights color. It is most convenient, especially for Mom.

It quickly replaced our previous little helper in our affections. The name Alexa gets called out more often than actual members of our family. It even knows my name and will sometimes say, “Sure, Cullen,” to something I’ve asked.

Which is really, really creepy. But I digress.

One of the other features Alexa can do is play Spotify music. It has a nice speaker and sounds good. This, too, gets frequent use.

Except when music started playing in the house ten minutes ago, no one asked for it.

The music just started.

Nearest we could figure it heard whatever video Mom was listening to and decided on it’s own to respond. No big deal. I call out, “Alexa, stop.”

Only she doesn’t stop.

Todd tries, “Alexa, stop playing music.”

Nothing doing.

We keep right on calling out instructions, without any luck. Todd starts losing his cool, to the point he’s disturbing Daisy Mae. Poor dog comes running over to me for protection.

The music, while nice, keeps playing. Todd even tries to mute the silly thing and nothing works.

By this point, I’ve disengaged from the upset dog and walked into the living room. Alexa has a screen that displays Spotify when she… it is playing the app. I should be able to turn off the music that way. Failing that, I can unplug it. If that fails, I throw it to the floor and stop on it until it stops.

Very tech savvy I am.

Only when I reach the device, I don’t see the Spotify app. In fact, I can see that the volume on Alexa has been turned off, per Todd’s request.

The source of the music? Remember how I mentioned a previous little helper? She… I mean it. It was playing the music the whole time.

I’m not sure what this all means. Perhaps the other helper just wanted to remind us it was still there. Or perhaps this is the first sign that the computer devices have come to replace us all.

Dunno, don’t care. I’m just hunting up my shovel and burying both devices. To be safe.

[SITE] Heh heh heh

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn Site InformationLeave a comment

Boy, am I doing a great job up updating the site. Heh heh.

Apparently WordPress AI agrees with me. When I asked for an “Improved Title”, these possibilities popped up:

Man, how did we live before AI?

I’m working on new possible headers for the site. Watch this space tomorrow for more.

Until then, have an alien. In fact, have two.

[Site] Real Life Writes the Plot

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn Site InformationLeave a comment

My mom went into the hospital, so the need to update the blog went into the header. That’s why I haven’t been writing.

The reason I’m writing now is that last Thursday I wrote and finished a short story. First in a long time. This Thursday I’m going to look at it and fiddle with it to see if I can’t improve on it.

I have just started a four day weekend, which hopefully will result in writing. For this blog, for the other blog, for myself.

Once again, trying to get into a routine. Not as easy as it looks. Though you could say I’ve gotten into a routine of not being in a routine…

[Site] Blathering As Writing Practice

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn Site InformationLeave a comment

Every week I need to post something.

It’s to encourage me to write. To make time in my “busy schedule” to write.

There are two problems with this.

Problem number one is that I don’t always think of something to write about. It happens.

I also sometimes think “This would be a good post” while at work, then when I come home wonder what I was thinking. Or the key to what I want to write is gone. Or I no longer have enough time to work on the project.

On the one hand you can’t force something into being. On the other hand, that’s just an excuse not to write.

Instead of doing what I was thinking of, I could write something I hadn’t. Do a stream of conscious thing. Let the words flow. The important thing is that I’m writing, and that the writing flows more or less logically from one point to the next.

That’s what this post is an attempt at doing. Super effective so far.

Problem number two really isn’t a problem. I actually am writing. I’m working on novel notes. Character work, world work, story work. Stuff I should have done years ago. Stuff I’ve been fiddling with for the past two years.

This, however, does nothing for the blog. And I am now paying good money for this blog.

Same holds true for the review site. For over a year I’ve been paying for it, and not once have I posted a review.

Put that aside for now.

All of this is a long winded way of saying I need to do something about it A bit of writing that interests me that I can post on site that I don’t force myself to do. Yet I actually force myself to do. If you can dig it.

An idea I’ve been toying with is doing a sort of review of The New Annotated H. P. Lovecraft. Not of the collection, though, but the stories therein, starting with Dagon. They might not be long reviews. They might not be thoughtful. I might even skip some or all of the other tales. But I’ve had some thoughts rereading Old Providence, and maybe that would be worth fiddling with.

Connected to this thought (seriously, there is a link) I’ve been mulling over talking about a revelation I’ve had dealing with The Cask of Amontillado. Over the years this has become one of my favorite of Poe’s works, and I have a thing or two to say about it. Maybe not the most original of things. A fact that has stopped no writer from blathering before.

I have also figured out just why Godzilla keeps coming to shore at Japan. And there’s my little Anime Theory of Godzilla that simply must be aired.

I could, of course, mention the worst short story I’ve ever written. Seriously, knowing it’s existence is such a weight off my chest. Everything after it has been so much better because of it. The only problem here is that to do it justice (ha!) I have to reread it. A task I’m not certain I’m up to.

Oh dear God, is it bad.

As I’m restarting the site, I could revamp or rework some old school series. The Hell… ?! comes to mind on that, though I’ve not hit too many bizarre situations that warrant that title.

Well, except for the plagiarist who, in the process of apologizing for her theft, plagiarized an essay about plagiarism from I believe a magazine dealing with plagiarism. Something that is… Well it’s kinda… The Hell… ?!

And so on and so forth. The ideas are there. And next week I hope to do one of them.

Of course, I could again rattle on as I’m doing now. To be honest this stream of thought experiment hasn’t been a bad thing, all things considered. It just has to be on a subject that isn’t what I might be writing about.

That leaves potential things I might draw as fair game. Or not.

Anyways, see you next Friday. Or sooner. Or later. Whenever I plant myself here and write.

The Big Three (IV) – Summation

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn The Big ThreeLeave a comment

So. Why start out like this? Why talk, if ever so fleetingly, of these three characters as a personal introduction?

I could have, of course, listed the authors that made me want to be a Writer (Edgar Allan Poe, Stephen King, and H. P. Lovecraft, in order, for the record.) I could have talked about the One Big Moment in Junior High that pushed me in that direction. I could have talked genre, of my interest in Horror, Science Fiction, and Fantasy.

I could have done a lot of things.

This, I think, covers most of who I am. Why I am.

All three characters have stories of action and adventure.

All three have moments of Horror and bits of Science Fiction and Fantasy.

All three filled a bored child’s life when he needed it.

And all three, for good or ill, influenced and influence me. They were the first. They lead the way.

It might be important to know that. Heading forward.

[Site Update] Identifying the Sites Peccadilloes 

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn Site Information2 Comments

This site has always had two main problems. Well, it’s really one main problem as it all connects back to me. Call it two symptoms, if you will.

The first is that it doesn’t update regularly. I did wonders at the start, but at the start I was a jobless wastrel with plenty of time on my hands. These days I have a draining job and frantically working on finishing even one of my novels before I die of old age.

(Over twelve potential protagonists. Some with series story lines. With more coming every day it seems. Where was this wellspring in my youth?)

The point is I plan to post every Friday. Doesn’t mean it’s going to happen. But I’m trying to do better.

The second problem of the original run was that I’d start series and never finish them. Just ran out of things to say, stopped, planned to go back, never did.

This is more of an issue than the first. As guys like G. R. R. Martin might tell you.

This I don’t want to see happen now that I’ve started over. But when the well runs dry, when I don’t know how to proceed, there’s a problem.

Hence no updates.

Problems been solved. The series is finished (should have been finished before I started, but that’s something for another day)

The next two updates we continue on this strange little excursion. Then we’ll see what we shall see.

The Big Three (I): Does Whatever a Spider Can

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn Comics2 Comments

One of the potential joys of restarting this site is “doing things right”. Such as introducing (or reintroducing) myself to the Reader. Laying out my interests, showing where this blog will lead. I’m not saying I did it wrong the first time. But I am strongly implying that.

How to do it varies, but I think I’m going to start by talking about the Big Three Heroes of my childhood. After that, I plan on reposting a few of the essays related to these oh so similar characters before moving on to other things.

Where to start with these three is ease enough: Spider-man. As in all likelihood he really was the first fictional hero I had.

When I was a little guy (a very little guy) my most favorite cartoon was the original Spider-man series. I would watch it on channel 44 so often that the number 44 was my favorite. From the cartoon I’d go on to the PBS series Electric Company, which on occasion had a Spider-man sketch, and, of course, the comics themselves. If it was related to the Wall Crawler in any way, I no doubt saw it in my youth. From Spider-man and His Amazing Friends to the live action TV series to even slightly connected stuff like Spider-woman.

This has continued to a degree to this day. I’ve been collecting Marvel Masterworks of the original Amazing Spider-man run, the Marvel Team Ups, and even Spectacular Spider-man. Up until Disney got its claws in him, I’ve watched most every series, with Spider-man Unlimited.

All of this begs the question, why? What has Spider-man got that other super heroes don’t? For me, at least.

Maybe it’s a combination of things. When well written, the comics are entertaining adventure stories, full of wit and excitement. While powerful in his own right with his spider strength and spider-sense, Spider-man tends to be the underdog, especially in the early days. His foes range from dastardly criminal minds to mag geniuses to literal monsters. A good Spidey story is a thing of beauty, something I can reread again and again.

I should point out that the teenager aspect was never a part of his charm for me. I was a toddler when I started being a fan. He might as well have been Batman’s age for all I cared.

Still kind of saddens me thinking about how much older that he is I am now.

As this site continues, I’ll no doubt be going into further details, talking about stories and characters I like or dislike, trying to make a case for the opinion. I’m not much of a fan of the newer stuff. Around the Nineties they started moving away from what I liked about the character and these days he’s Flanderized beyond belief.

And I don’t plan on talking about Miles Morales. Ever.

Next on the list, a larger presence on my childhood. Much. At least thirty stories high, breathing fire, standing in the sky…