Category: Summation

[A MONTH OF HORROR – VII] Francis and a Summation of the First Week

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn A Month of Horror, Monster Movies, Short Film, SummationLeave a comment

A girl rows out to the middle of the wrong lake.

Thought I watched this for a Month of Horror. The second one, in fact. As that’s in the archives and not easily gotten to, I’m reprinting what I said here about the short:

So I’m looking for an animated Horror short to watch on YouTube. This one looked interesting to me for whatever reason, and I clicked on it. As it loaded up, I thought I’d look for another one after I was done here. A cartoon about a young woman going to the center of a lake, where something knocks at the bottom of her boat. Thought it was called Knock, Knock.

It wasn’t. It was called Francis.

Well I thought it was a funny coincidence.

That out of the way, this is a nice little feature, with only one or two missteps along the way. These are Cullen Carps, though, and we can ignore them safely.

(Well, no, let’s hit one: we see the underside of the boat when the knocker should be there and see nothing. Shouldn’t have done that.)

Everything else, though, works. It’s narrated, and the narrator does a hell of a job selling the story. Even without the animation, just listening to it, you’d have a nice chill going for you.

No points given in that golden oldie. So here’s what I thought about tonight’s viewing:

4 out of 4

Summation of Week One

This is what was watched:

  • House on Haunted Hill (1959)
  • The White Reindeer (1952)
  • House on Eden (2025)
  • Suspiria (1977)
  • The Vampire (1957)
  • Werewolf in a Girls’ Dormitory (1961)
  • Francis [SHORT] (2013)

Best Movie of the Week

This was a great week for Horror, with only one stumbling block out of the bunch. I’m going to give the nod to Suspiria, as that never fails to delight me. Honestly, though? It could easy be a six way tie as far as I’m concerned here and now.

Worst Movie of the Week

Werewolf in a Girls’ Dormitory. Hands down. Not a chill to be found. The Vampire is a better werewolf movie.

Unintended Themes 

Three werewolf movies and three movies out of the Fifties. I don’t care, just noting something interesting

Biggest Surprise

 House on Haunted Hill. That one was creepy, and I’d seen it before. Most interesting.

Newest Film Watched

House on Eden at 2025.

Oldest Film Watched

The White Reindeer at 1952.

Best Monster Flick

Francis.

One week down, three more to go!

[MONTH OF HORROR] Trick or Treat and a Summation of the Month

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn A Month of Horror, Lists, SummationLeave a comment

Wow. A whole month, with only one sick day and one skipped day. More importantly, a review every day, plus extra.

A Welltun Cares Presents first!

The final feature of the month was Trick or Treat, which tells you absolutely nothing as there’s a bunch by this title. This particular one is a sort of Carrie clone, as a picked upon teenager uses the evil spirit of his Heavy Metal hero to get revenge upon those who wronged him. Very Eighties, very fun. One of my favorites and frankly the best way to end this series.

And now an overview of what I’ve watched. The dates are when the movies pop up as Sister Site reviews. The asterisks (*) are the ones with Long Reviews. This might change without notice.

Here’s the list:

Week One

  • As Above, So Below (10/13/23)
  • Demons (10/27/23)
  • Demons 2 (11/10/23)
  • Man Made Monster* (11/24/23)
  • The Comedy of Terror (12/1/23)
  • The Church (12/8/23)
  • The Curse of the Doll People (12/15/23)

Week Two

  • Dawn Breaks Behind the Eyes [12-22-23]
  • V/H/S/99 [12-29-23]
  • V/H/S/85 [01-05-24]
  • The House of Seven Corpses [01-12-24]
  • Evil Dead Trap [01-19-24]
  • One Dark Night [01-26-24]
  • The Other Side of the Box [Short Film]
  • The Chair [Short Film]
  • Stalled [Short Film]
  • Friday the 13th* [02-09-24]
  • The Conference [02-02-24]

Week Three

  • Killdozer! [02/16/24]
  • Phantasm [02/23/24]
  • The Bridge Curse [02/29/24]
  • Ghoulies II [03/08/24]
  • The Cat and the Canary [03/15/24]
  • Kiss of the Vampire [03/22/24]

Week Four

  • The Breach [03/29/24]
  • Schlock [04/05/24]
  • Noroi: The Curse [04/12/24]
  • Bloody Muscle Body Builder in Hell [04/19/24]
  • Hospital [04/26/24]
  • Prince of Darkness [05/03/24]
  • When Evil Lurks [05/10/24]
  • The Barn [05/17/24]

Week 5

  • V/H/S Viral [05/24/24]
  • Dementia 13 [05/31/24]
  • Trick or Treat [06/07/24]

Next is the obligatory pointless Awards for the week. I’m going to mix it up a little and do top 5 lists instead of the usual way of doing things.

Favored Five

These are the five films I liked the most this month:

  1. Prince of Darkness – This classic John Carpenter flick is always a welcome view.
  2. Dementia 13 – A nice surprise, especially because I’ve been avoiding watching it for decades.
  3. Demons 2 – Pizza Schlock at its finest!
  4. Comedy of Terror – Vincent Price and the gang have a blast running a funeral home that seeks out clients.
  5. Trick or Treat – Never meet your heroes. Especially if they’ve become evil spirits.

Scariest I’ve Seen This Month

While not Favored, these flicks put the fear in me and should be commended/list for it.

  1. When Evil Lurks – Too bleak for my blood, but I can’t deny its power.
  2. Noroi: The Curse – A great Found Footage flick with Lovecraftian overtones.
  3. V/H/S Viral – The whole series seldom misses a step, but so far this is the best of the bunch.
  4. The Conference – Probably the best Slasher flick I’ve seen in years.
  5. Phantasm – Don’t ask me why, but as familiar as I am with this flick, it still gets me in places.

Worst of the Lot

This goes in order of very worst to pretty damn bad:

  1. Schlock – Hands down the worst movie I watched this month. Not so much bottom of the barrel but in a subterranean cave beneath the barrel. A cave that has toxic waste leaking in. Gah.
  2. Dawn Breaks Behind the Eyes – Artsy fartsy bull crap.
  3. Man Made Monster – Lon Chaney Jr. deserves better. And if rumor is true this movie helped him get it. So it has that going for it.
  4. Ghoulies II – Bad puppets couldn’t save this flick
  5. Bloody Muscle Body Builder in Hell – This is a terrible movie, but in an entertaining way.

And that’s the month! Has some fun, got my Sister Site running right on into June. I might add some Golden Oldies to that mix (pushing some of the dates back), I might do fuller reviews to replace the brief ones I’ve done, I might even get so more fresh content in there. Sky’s the limit. No pressure to perform for a change.

Next week is NaNoWriMo. Fingers cross it goes as well as this month.

[MONTH OF HORROR] The Barn and a Summation of the Fourth Week

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn A Month of Horror, SummationLeave a comment

Real quick: I did indeed do a write-up for When Evil Lurks. Thus with today’s review also in the pipeline, I am now ahead one movie.

Today’s flick, The Barn, feels like it came right out of the Eighties, but in a good way. A group of high school seniors head out for one last go at trick or treating and end up freeing demons. As one does. Really a fun little flick and I look forward to watching the sequel. Which may or may not happen tomorrow.

And now the week that was:

  • The Breach [03/29/24]
  • Schlock [04/05/24]
  • Noroi: The Curse [04/12/24]
  • Bloody Muscle Body Builder in Hell [04/19/24]
  • Hospital [04/26/24]
  • Prince of Darkness [05/03/24]
  • When Evil Lurks [05/10/24]
  • The Barn [05/17/24]

Next is the obligatory pointless Awards for the week:

Best Movie of the Week: Noroi: The Curse, but only because I liked it better than When Evil Lurks.

Worst of the Week: Schlock. Unless I pick something worse in the next three days (HA!) it’s going to be the worst of the month hands down.

Biggest Disappointment: Schlock again. Hot on its heels is Hospital and When Evil Lurks. Which, again, is a great Horror flick. It’s just too bleak and miserable for me.

Best Terrible Movie: Bloody Muscle Body Builder in Hell. Really bad, but a lot of fun.

Newest Film Watched: When Evil Lurks. It came out this month. I’m cutting edge, I am.

Oldest Film Watched: Schlock. It’s as old as I am. I’ve just weathered the years better.

Old Favorite: Prince of Darkness. I had to give it SOME reward.

Movie That Pops Up On This List Too Much: Schlock. Seriously. I’m tired off seeing it here.

Potential New Favorite: The Barn.

Movie With the Best Gorilla Suit: Schl– OH COME ON!

[MONTH OF HORROR] The Kiss of the Vampire and a Summation of the Third Week

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn A Month of Horror, SummationLeave a comment

The Kiss of the Vampire is completely misnamed. No Vampire kissing is ever shown. A better title would have been The Gaslighting of the Vampire’s Victim’s Husband. No, on second thought, maybe not.

Anyways, this is a Hammer Flick during the prime of Hammer, so it’s obviously going to be good. Never saw it before, but it’s become a new favorite.

And now, the week that was:

  • Killdozer! [02/16/24]
  • Phantasm [02/23/24]
  • The Bridge Curse [02/29/24] – Yes, this puts it on a Thursday. As the film takes place on February 29, it seemed more appropriate. Like doing a Friday the 13th on the same date.
  • Ghoulies II [03/08/24]
  • The Cat and the Canary [03/15/24]
  • Kiss of the Vampire [03/22/24]

Next is the obligatory pointless Awards for the week:

Best Movie of the Week: This is a tough one, as I hit a nice string of good flicks. A coin flip gave it to The Cat and the Canary, but it could have easily been Phantasm. Among others.

Worst of the Week: Ghoulies II. Didn’t even have to think about it.

Movie With a Surplus of Punctuation: Killdozer!.

Best Foreign Flick: The Kiss of the Vampire. Just not The Bridge Curse‘s day.

Which would be February 29th. We’ve established this.

Newest Film Watched: The Bridge Curse, which came out in 2020.

Oldest Film Watched: The Cat and the Canary, which came out in 1927. Almost a hundred years old. No spring kitty, this.

Film with the Heaviest Monster: Killdozer!. Though the camera adds ten pounds. And a exclamation point.

Best Bad Advise Given By an AI: “Include the reason why ‘Killdozer!‘ was named the movie with a surplus of punctuation.” It’s right there in the title.

[MONTH OF HORROR] The Conference and a Summation of the Second Week

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn A Month of Horror, Summation2 Comments

Wow, that’s bleeding edge reviewing right there. The Conference came out yesterday and I’ve reviewed today.

And the review pops up next year.

In February.

Might want to move that forward.

Anyways, The Conference has a group of municipal workers gathering for a, get this, conference. Unfortunately for them the very thing they’re discussing, a brand new mall, has someone mad enough to see every one there dead.

Swedish Slasher flick. One of the best I’ve ever seen. Might knock down The Prowler from that perch I had it on.

And now for our second feature. The week that was in viewing order. The numbers beside the titles are when the films pop up over on Welltun Cares Reviews. The order might change on whim. Especially since I think The Conference should pop up a wee bit sooner.

Also I didn’t review the short films for the sister site. And I’m still reworking Friday the 13th.

  • Dawn Breaks Behind the Eyes [12-22-23]
  • V/H/S/99 [12-29-23]
  • V/H/S/85 [01-05-24]
  • The House of Seven Corpses [01-12-24]
  • Evil Dead Trap [01-19-24]
  • One Dark Night [01-26-24]
  • The Other Side of the Box [Short Film]
  • The Chair [Short Film]
  • Stalled [Short Film]
  • Friday the 13th [??-??-??]
  • The Conference [02-02-24]

Next is the obligatory pointless Awards for the week:

Best Movie of the Week: The Conference. Best slasher flick I’ve seen. Might even be one of the best Horror flicks, too.

Best Anthology of the Week: V/H/S/85. V/H/S/99 was pretty good, too.

Worst Movie of the Week: Dawn Breaks Behind the Eyes. Such a waste of potential.

Biggest Disappointment: The House of Seven Corpses. Man, that should have been better.

Newest Film Watched: The Conference. Came out yesterday.

Oldest Film Watched: The House of Seven Corpses

Best Use of Past Their Prime Star: One Lonely Night, for getting Adam West paid.

Movie I Liked that I Probably Shouldn’t: Evil Dead Trap. Though I do like worse.

Movie I Wouldn’t Have Expected to Watch This Month: Friday the 13th. I wasn’t going to watch a movie I had a review for. And yet. Special nod goes to the shorts, as I wasn’t going to watch them, either.

[MONTH OF HORROR] Curse of the Doll People and a Summation of the First Week

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn A Month of Horror, SummationLeave a comment

Okay, tonight’s feature was Curse of the Doll People, a rip off of A. Merritt’s classic Burn, Witch, Burn. It was okay, I guess. Little doll monsters, an interesting Zombie, and a bad guy who was dumb as a post.

This marks the seventh review I’ve written as a buffer for the sister site. That’s 7/31.

And now the week’s summation. Here’s what I watched, with the scheduled dates for the full reviews. This may change–it’s a lot of Horror one after the other and I might want to through in some Sci Fi or Fantasy. Or a Golden Oldie.

Speaking of which, the week gaps you’ll see are where I already had Golden Oldies in place.

Anyways, in watch order:

  • As Above, So Below (10/13/23)
  • Demons (10/27/23)
  • Demons 2 (11/10/23)
  • Man Made Monster* (11/24/23)
  • The Comedy of Terror (12/1/23)
  • The Church (12/8/23)
  • The Curse of the Doll People (12/15/23)

Next is the obligatory pointless Awards for the week:

Best Movie of the Week: As Above, So Below. Hands down the best one. The Comedy of Terror comes close.

Worst Movie of the Week: Man Made Monster.

Best Pizza Shlock: Demons 2. Almost wrote Demons by mistake.

Biggest Surprise: Man Made Monster is my first full review since I believe February. Which is nice. As Above, So Below being as good as it is gets it a mention here. Also in the running is The Church, which I honestly believed was Demons 3 at one point (which it is, but not the point I thought.)

Newest Film Watched: As Above, So Below at 2014.

Oldest Film Watched: Man Made Monster at 1941.

Most Sophisticated a Film: The Comedy of Terror. It quotes Shakespeare and that instantly classes things up. Which, now that I think about it, would mean the American Version of King Kong Versus Godzilla would be sophisticated for the same reason. That’s just wrong.

Film Not Even Mentioned In Passing in These Awards Despite Having Its Name in the Title: The Curse of the Doll People. I was feeling guilty, alright?

One week down, three weeks and a few days to go. Will I make a full month?

Never have before…

[Month of Horror] Third Week Summation

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn A Month of Horror, Summation1 Comment

What a week.

The Horror stuff I watched this week goes as follows:

  • Sette Note in Nero/The Psychic (Italian Feature)
  • Suspiria (Italian Feature)
  • Joyû-rei (Japanese Feature)
  • This Dark Thought (Animated Short)
  • There’s a Man in the Woods (Animated Short)
  • Homesick (Short)
  • Glorious (Feature)
  • Who’s Hungry (Animated Short)
  • Leave (Short)
  • Run (Short)
  • The Torture Chamber of Dr. Sadism (West German Feature)

So much for watching more features than shorts. Though it should be said the closest thing to a stinker in regards to the features was Dr. Sadism, and it wasn’t half bad.

Three perfects this week, and all at the start of the week. Christopher Lee makes an appearance on this blog (might be a first even considering the blog’s original run.)

As for the best by preference, I’m going to ignore Suspiria, because of course Suspiria wins, it’s one of my favorite movies.

With the remainders, the top three are as follows:

  1. Sette Note in Nero
  2. Joyû-rei
  3. There’s a Man in the Woods.

Homesick and Leave take bottom place, though I think Leave should be slightly lower than Homesick.

Gratuitous misuse of H. P. Lovecraft’s goes to Glorious. The Elder God used in it is named after the son of Cthulhu, and is in no form like what’s presented in the flick. Homage? Let’s call it that.

[Month of Horror] Second Week Summation

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn A Month of Horror, Ghost Movies, Monster Movies, Short Film, Summation2 Comments

Told you no repeat of the ten movie watch. This week I watched eleven. And skipped a day.

The movies are as follows:

  • Blackbird (Short)
  • In Vaulted Halls Entombed (Netflix Show episode)
  • Chainsaw Maid (Animated Short)
  • Deadstream (Feature)
  • Waiting (Animated Short)
  • Dagon (Animated Short)
  • Laura Hasn’t Slept (Short)
  • Withered (Short)
  • 2AM: The Smiling Man (Real Short)
  • This Is Not a Test (Short)
  • The Shrine (Feature)

Note: Unless noted otherwise, the shorts I watch for these reviews are on You Tube. Except for Laura Hasn’t Slept , which has been pulled by Paramount.

Looks like more shorts than features. Not my intent for this series, but real life writes the plot. I’m already doing better for Week 3.

Only two of these were perfects. No film dipped below 2.5 points, which might be an improvement. Depending on where you stand on the matter.

The top three, in order of preference more than quality:

1. (tied) Deadstream/Chainsaw Maid

3. The Shrine.

Though 2AM comes close to edging out The Shrine.

The worst flick I watched would be Blackbird.

Film pushing the Short category to its limit: Dagon. Really, it’s more of an audio with pictures.

Two weeks down. A new week begins…

[Month of Horror] First Week Summation

On By Cullen M. M. WatersIn A Month of Horror, SummationLeave a comment

Okay, this first week of the Month of Horror I watched ten films (don’t expect a repeat).

The films were:

  • The Mummy (1932)
  • Bride of Frankenstein
  • Rood (Short)
  • Eldritch Code (Short)
  • Shinsen (Short)
  • I See You (Short)
  • They Crawl Beneath
  • Deep Red
  • Chopping Mall
  • C.H.U.D.

The average score I dished out last week was 2.95, so as a rule whatever I watched was between good or average. One flick in particular brought the whole thing down. Which is only interesting statisticwise.

Six out of ten were full length films. Two were short films. Two were cartoons.

I gave out three perfect scores. None hit zero. A good thing. For me.

The top three, in order of preference more than quality, were as follow”

  1. Deep Red.
  2. Bride of Frankenstein
  3. C.H.U.D

The worst of the lot was They Crawl Beneath.

The guy who got dumped the hardest: Boris Karloff. Two flicks and he never once got the girl.

Actually, I don’t think Boris ever did get the girl.

Any way, on to the next review.