A family moves in to a house where evil lurks.

You know, standard Horror plot.

I really wanted to like this movie more than I actually do. I don’t hate it. Can’t say I have meh feelings about it. But it’s not what I’d hoped for, and that’s too bad.

This is a Lucio Fulci, which means lots of gore, an somewhat incoherent plot, and entirely too many maggots. In the grand scheme of things, it’s better than The Gates of Hell but not as good as Seven Notes in Black.

I will say this about it. This is the second time this month I watched a movie where I wanted the kid in it to die. About the same reasons, too, compounded with an annoying dubbed voice.

Only when the kid was in danger (and he was, several times), I wanted to see him get out of it.

I think that’s a credit to Fulci and this movie.

I just wish I could like it more.

A woman’s cop husband vanishes in a deserted hospital and no one will talk about it. She hires a camera man to film her quest to find the answers.

And answers she does find.

As this is a Found footage film, you know more or less how it goes. There a moment towards the end of the film that doesn’t quite work for me. Over all, though, this is a well shot, well acted film. It’s one of the better examples of its subgenere.

A drummer finds himself framed for murder by a blackmailer who wants to drive him nuts.

Or something.

The plot really doesn’t make a hell of a lot of sense. As it’s an Italian dub, critiquing the acting is a non-starter, but the voices are what you’d expect. And…

It’s a Dario Argento flick (his third one), so it’s very well shot. In like his next Giallo (the superb Deep Red) he really doesn’t play fair with the mystery. In fact, as a younger man I’d have said this was a perfect representation of an Italian Horror flick: More style over substance.

I enjoyed the flick. I intend to buy the flick when I get the chance.

But it’s really not Argento at his best.

Not long ago I condemned Splatter University as being dull.

I apparently didn’t know what dull was.

It’s pointless to summarize the plot. This movie has no plot. It’s stitch together from two different films, one of which is The Aztec Mummy. The Aztec Mummy was an entertaining flick, but all of that was leeched out in this film.

This is the second flick this month I’d voluntarily watch Pieces over ever seeing again. No man deserves to have that happen to him.

No man.

How to say it…

Fundamentally this has the same premise as Halloween. A unstoppable lunatic escapes a hospital. Pursuing him is one of his caretakers, a man determined to kill the lunatic, and a weary cop. Victims fall in his wake as he for some reason seeks out a home with a baby sister (well, two) and two children, a boy and a girl.

As such, it’s kind of interesting comparing the two films. Halloween is a tight little number filled with characters you can care about with a very creepy monster. Absurd, meanwhile, has placeholders for most of the cast. I mean, you generate opinions about them, you don’t want to see some of them die. But there’s a certain something lacking.

And I wanted the little boy to die.

I wanted him to die a lot.

Absurd also drags. I can’t say I was bored, make no mistake. But I did check the run time at one point and was shocked by how much was left to go.

This flick also relies on gruesome kills. They are cringe worthy, but not what I would consider good. To bring another classic into play, Deep Red hurt me more. as did the Lucio Fulci movies I’ve watched.

The ending, too, is problematic, but that’s going into spoiler territory and I don’t wanna do that.

I can’t really carp about acting as it’s dubbed, beyond the fact I wish they found actors to dub the part. The little boy is the worst offender and in places he

Won’t.

Shut.

Up.

Bad mouthing the flick aside, I actually enjoyed it. It’s not a rush out and see again, mind you. Certainly not a good film. Just something I wouldn’t object to seeing again.

Oh, one last thing. Towards the end Absurd has a certain… incident occur and I made up my mind that if the final scene happened just the way I wanted, I’d love this movie.

I love this movie.

I just wish they killed the little boy.

Sorry about the spoiler but I didn’t want you to get your hopes up too much.

A curse turns nobleman Count Waldemar Daninsky into a Werewolf by the light of the full moon. The usual mayhem ensues.

Giving a full synopsis than that is pretty pointless. It’s a Werewolf movie, clearly inspired by Universal’s Wolfman. You have lots of shots of the moon, lots of a furry Daninsky lurking about the dark, and lots of killing.

It’s like a more fun Slasher movie, really.

Once again Paul Naschy stars as Count Waldemar Daninsky. By this point he knows the drill. He seemed a little wooden in this one, like he wasn’t enjoying himself much. That could be me, of course.

Blood and gore here is typical of the period. Sadly in at least one scene the Werewolf mask looked like a mask. Oh well, what was I expecting CGI?

This is the seventh film in the series, but don’t let that stop you. It’s a reboot.

You want a fun little show with blood, gore and naked chicks? Here you go.

Typical Naschy, in other words.