This, it should be noted, is the original flick. The classic Silent. One of THE MOST INFLUENCIAL FILMS IN HORROR.
It’s okay.
Actually, it’s a great flick. Very entertaining. Every single Horror/Thriller about a group of people gathering for a will being bumped off by a killer rips this film off. Even Scooby Doo borrows.
With this I am now at 20 reviews. I’ve missed a day due to illness, but I’ve been hitting the marks I’ve wanted to hit. Eleven more days.
It might seem like I’m letting down the side, but I did watch a movie yesterday. Specifically Phantasm, that Horror classic about a teen being chased around a mausoleum by a Tall Man and his balls. Which sounds questionable but isn’t. Yet it’s true. Kind of.
Good flick, though I have issues.
Not a good flick is Ghoulies II, sequel to the flick Gremlins Ghoulies. This is more of a copy of the Christmas Classic than its forbearer, but it has a little charm. Very little. Probably Cullen only little. If you’re looking for a flick about a haunted house haunted by real demons, I’m sure there’s a better one out there than this one. But I think viewers might have fun here.
19 reviews. All the way to March. Feeling good about that.
Missed a day! Got sick! And this week isn’t looking good for catching up.
Thank goodness for watching two movies in one day. I’m still on track for a perfect 31.
Anyway, The Bridge Curse is about a group of young college students wanting to set up a test of courage for their Juniors. Unfortunately for them, they themselves perform the ritual wrong and that unleashes a vindictive ghost.
It’s… okay. Everything works until the twist at the end, then the whole thing goes to pot. Oh well. Kinda good, and I kinda liked it, but I’m not seeing it again.
17 reviews in 17 days. Looking good.
Killdozer! is about an alien force stalking construction workers on a remote island. It takes over a bulldozer and kills Spencer: For Hire. What will Captain Sisko say?
Okay, that’s enough pop culture references. It’s a decent little TV movie based on a Theodore Sturgeon novella. I watched a lousy copy of it on YouTube, only to find a pristine one not five minutes after finishing the review for the sister site, also on YouTube.
This is my life.
Anyway, as I said last post, the Friday the 13th review is finished and scheduled. I now have 16 reviews out of the hoped for 31. I’ve been writing every day and feel pretty good.
WordPress has gone all in with the AI. Not only does it have something that will write my posts for me (something I find interesting but repellent) it will also go through what I’ve written and judge me for it. This latter one is actually kind of useful and I might use more of it in future. The former I’ve used for material here and, again, it might be good to go to that well at another time.
What I will not use AI for is the writing of excerpts. There’s a little feature on my dashboard that will write the damn things for me, and to the last I’ve found them more useless than useful.
Here’s a sample, created from my Friday the 13th review (Spoilers for a 40+ flick):
“Friday the 13th” (1980), written by Victor Miller and directed by Sean S. Cunningham, follows a group of young people who attempt to reopen a doomed campground and are killed one by one. The lone survivor, Alice, eventually confronts the killer, Mrs. Voorhees, whose motive is revenge for her drowned son, Jason. The film, while not a cinematic masterpiece, is appreciated for its suspense and classic horror elements. Despite initial mixed reviews, the film is recognized today for its significant impact on the horror genre.
That’s basically my whole frickin’ review right there. Why would readers click on through to read more?
It spoils the damn movie, too. I give spoiler warnings over there for a reason, damn it.
Best of all, I told the thing the desired length was 50 words. That puppy up there? 85 words. So it’s also chatty.
I mean no matter the length I set it will ALWAYS go over. Always.
Do you want to know what a good excerpt looks like? Try this:
A group of young people make the mistake of trying to reopen the wrong campground.
That’s it. That tells you what the film is without ruining the experience. I could give the score, that would be okay. But whatever I do, at least I’m not stomping all over my review.
Geez. The Hell, man. The hell.
Furthermore: The excerpt for this post?
The author expresses mixed opinions on WordPress’s AI features, praising its ability to review posts but criticizing its automatic excerpt generator. The latter, they argue, drafts lengthy summaries that essentially spoil full reviews, and ignore set content length limits. They highlight a manually crafted, concise synopsis as a more desirable excerpt.
51 words. It’s like it’s trying to cheese me off.
Now fair’s fair. Here’s the AI Assistant reviewing what I’ve wrote up to this point:
The post content discusses the author’s mixed opinions on WordPress’s AI features. They appreciate the AI’s ability to review posts but criticize its automatic excerpt generator. The author argues that the automatic excerpts are lengthy and spoil the full reviews instead of enticing readers. They provide a concise, manually crafted synopsis as a better alternative.
Now that’s helpful.
Wow, that’s bleeding edge reviewing right there. The Conference came out yesterday and I’ve reviewed today.
And the review pops up next year.
In February.
Might want to move that forward.
Anyways, The Conference has a group of municipal workers gathering for a, get this, conference. Unfortunately for them the very thing they’re discussing, a brand new mall, has someone mad enough to see every one there dead.
Swedish Slasher flick. One of the best I’ve ever seen. Might knock down The Prowler from that perch I had it on.
And now for our second feature. The week that was in viewing order. The numbers beside the titles are when the films pop up over on Welltun Cares Reviews. The order might change on whim. Especially since I think The Conference should pop up a wee bit sooner.
Also I didn’t review the short films for the sister site. And I’m still reworking Friday the 13th.
- Dawn Breaks Behind the Eyes [12-22-23]
- V/H/S/99 [12-29-23]
- V/H/S/85 [01-05-24]
- The House of Seven Corpses [01-12-24]
- Evil Dead Trap [01-19-24]
- One Dark Night [01-26-24]
- The Other Side of the Box [Short Film]
- The Chair [Short Film]
- Stalled [Short Film]
- Friday the 13th [??-??-??]
- The Conference [02-02-24]
Next is the obligatory pointless Awards for the week:
Best Movie of the Week: The Conference. Best slasher flick I’ve seen. Might even be one of the best Horror flicks, too.
Best Anthology of the Week: V/H/S/85. V/H/S/99 was pretty good, too.
Worst Movie of the Week: Dawn Breaks Behind the Eyes. Such a waste of potential.
Biggest Disappointment: The House of Seven Corpses. Man, that should have been better.
Newest Film Watched: The Conference. Came out yesterday.
Oldest Film Watched: The House of Seven Corpses
Best Use of Past Their Prime Star: One Lonely Night, for getting Adam West paid.
Movie I Liked that I Probably Shouldn’t: Evil Dead Trap. Though I do like worse.
Movie I Wouldn’t Have Expected to Watch This Month: Friday the 13th. I wasn’t going to watch a movie I had a review for. And yet. Special nod goes to the shorts, as I wasn’t going to watch them, either.
I may or may not have taken the day off for making a buffer for the sister site. As this was Friday the 13th it seemed appropriate to watch the movie. I have it as a Golden Oldie that hasn’t been reposted and I’ve been delaying it because a.) my thoughts on the movie have changed since writing it and b.) I wanted a rewatched because of the former reason. Rewatch accomplished, I’m thinking of rewriting everything except maybe the Viewing Thoughts section. Then it gets a repost. Maybe on the next Friday the 13th.
This is, of course, the original film and not the remake. While I didn’t hate that sucker I never had the calling to watch it again. Which is, of course, telling.
I watched several other short flicks today to make up for the potential day off. All three are on YouTube.
A man brings over a box for his estranged friend.
One of the problems I had last year watching shorts was how similar they all seemed to be. This one takes its premise and runs with it. Very good work, with good acting. Sort of wish I watched it last year instead of the questionable one I did watch.
A young man brings home the wrong chair.
Our previous flick had rules behind it’s supernatural and played with them more or less fair. This one has no such grounding. It’s a chaotic plot where the viewer isn’t quite sure what’s going on. Which, considering that’s exactly what our protagonist is feeling, is just fine. Great little flick. Might have been the best of the night, in fact, had it not been for…
A jerk of a business man finds himself trapped in a time paradox.
This isn’t Horror at all, but it’s too much fun not to mention. You’re left with some questions at the end, but all in all a good time is had. If you can only watch one of these shorts, make it this one.
A young woman’s desperation to join a group of girls leads to a nasty hazing prank. Which, frankly, seems to be the typical way things turn out.
Adam West makes an appearance in this one. I didn’t make any Batman jokes while watching it (not even to think of this film as One Dark Knight, which is clever enough so that I wish I thought of it.) I just thought he was rather wasted in the part.
Then I learn this was a lean period for him where he wasn’t getting much work at all. Now I’m glad he got a pay check.
Decent flick, by the by. Ends with an interesting use of the living dead. Could have been better, could have been worse.
Day 12 now is finished. I have 13 films done. Tomorrow’s, should I write it, will pop up on the sister site in February.
Nice buffer I’ve got going for me.
There isn’t any Evil Dead in this film, but it is a kind of a trap for a young reporter and her brave little team of investigators. It’s a very mean film and I’m not sure why I like it. But there you go. I have no taste.
This puts us at 12 reviews total. I’ve gotten through the rest of this year and most of January. So far the project’s worked a wee bit better than expected.
There are a few reviews that need touched up. Oh, and for the record I rewrote the one for The House of Seven Corpse. I decided I needed to go in more depth there.
Might have to do that again.
No idea what tomorrow will bring.
Wow. That was a disappointment.
The House of Seven Corpses is about a film crew who are filming in a murder house. One recital from the Book of the Dead and… well, it takes more than one reading. And it takes most of the movie before the killing starts…
I can’t say I was bored, but the end was so nonsensical…
I dunno. Waste of a good cast, I think.
Anyways, the review for this is done and the review for V/H/S/85 is done. Though there may be… reworkings. What I have will work, but there’s a doubt.
So far, ten days down, twenty one to go, eleven reviews written.
WELLTUN CARES PRESENTS 