How to say it…

Fundamentally this has the same premise as Halloween. A unstoppable lunatic escapes a hospital. Pursuing him is one of his caretakers, a man determined to kill the lunatic, and a weary cop. Victims fall in his wake as he for some reason seeks out a home with a baby sister (well, two) and two children, a boy and a girl.

As such, it’s kind of interesting comparing the two films. Halloween is a tight little number filled with characters you can care about with a very creepy monster. Absurd, meanwhile, has placeholders for most of the cast. I mean, you generate opinions about them, you don’t want to see some of them die. But there’s a certain something lacking.

And I wanted the little boy to die.

I wanted him to die a lot.

Absurd also drags. I can’t say I was bored, make no mistake. But I did check the run time at one point and was shocked by how much was left to go.

This flick also relies on gruesome kills. They are cringe worthy, but not what I would consider good. To bring another classic into play, Deep Red hurt me more. as did the Lucio Fulci movies I’ve watched.

The ending, too, is problematic, but that’s going into spoiler territory and I don’t wanna do that.

I can’t really carp about acting as it’s dubbed, beyond the fact I wish they found actors to dub the part. The little boy is the worst offender and in places he

Won’t.

Shut.

Up.

Bad mouthing the flick aside, I actually enjoyed it. It’s not a rush out and see again, mind you. Certainly not a good film. Just something I wouldn’t object to seeing again.

Oh, one last thing. Towards the end Absurd has a certain… incident occur and I made up my mind that if the final scene happened just the way I wanted, I’d love this movie.

I love this movie.

I just wish they killed the little boy.

Sorry about the spoiler but I didn’t want you to get your hopes up too much.

A curse turns nobleman Count Waldemar Daninsky into a Werewolf by the light of the full moon. The usual mayhem ensues.

Giving a full synopsis than that is pretty pointless. It’s a Werewolf movie, clearly inspired by Universal’s Wolfman. You have lots of shots of the moon, lots of a furry Daninsky lurking about the dark, and lots of killing.

It’s like a more fun Slasher movie, really.

Once again Paul Naschy stars as Count Waldemar Daninsky. By this point he knows the drill. He seemed a little wooden in this one, like he wasn’t enjoying himself much. That could be me, of course.

Blood and gore here is typical of the period. Sadly in at least one scene the Werewolf mask looked like a mask. Oh well, what was I expecting CGI?

This is the seventh film in the series, but don’t let that stop you. It’s a reboot.

You want a fun little show with blood, gore and naked chicks? Here you go.

Typical Naschy, in other words.

What goes on here?

A remote village has a vampire problem. People dying left and right. All with marks on the neck and blood drained from the body.

Only one of the local doctors says the whole vampire thing is nonsense. There has to be a logical explanation for the killings and he’s going to find it.

Turns out he’s completely wrong. The truth is about as bizarre as vampires.

Maybe even more so.

I watched this directly after Splatter University, and that might might be affecting my judgement. Hell, might. How could it not? Staring at the wall gave me more thrills than that flick.

This one, though, I think is a damn fine flick. Has elements that make no damn sense, don’t get me wrong, but it works in spite of this.

Helping the show is some great actors. Melvyn Douglas plays the skeptical lead, and while irritating in places did win me over. Lionel Atwill ably assists as a fellow Doctor helping in the case (well, a certain form of help. And then there’s Fay Wray, Kong’s Bride herself, gracing the flick with the presence. Of course she gets imperiled, but to my amazement, she doesn’t scream once.

Fay Wray!

Missed oppertunity.

It’s a short flick barely over an hour, but worth hunting down.

You know, it’s a terrible thing when Pieces is a better movie than you are.

Really.

Terrible.

The summery, in brief is that a lunatic is stalking a university and like all lunatics knows exactly where to be to off the unsuspecting. A new sociology professor begins hunting down the killer and oops! Made this movie sound more interesting than it is.

Sorry about that.

The whole thing seems disjointed, as is common with the really low budget flicks like this. Acting is performed, I guess. None of the characters are likable or, in some cases, necessary to the film. As it came up short on the run time, there’s padding added to make it to where it needed to be, barely.

Some thrills were generated towards the end, but that was done by mistake, I’m sure. The killer, as I said, teleports around and doesn’t have the excuse of being supernatural. While I’m not a Kool Kills kind of guy, I could have used some Kool Kills

Watching it I was often reminded of other Horror films set in schools I could have been watching. Fatal Games, House on Sorority Row, To All a Good Night, and Pieces, a film I rather hate. Made me wish I was watching them.

Yes, even Pieces.

No movie should make me wish I was watching Pieces.

Such a dull waste of time.

Okay, let’s cut to the chase.

Back in ye olden days there was a very friendly barber who liked to entertain a certain sort of clientle. Ones without friends. Ones without family. Ones without the sense of keeping their money safe elsewhere.

He gives these lucky few a very close shave, then sends them next door to his partner in crime. A baker who makes the darnedest meat pies. And the money the barber makes from this he splits with the baker.

In theory.

It’s a decent scam. Right up until the barber starts getting ideas above his station…

That all said, this flick isn’t anything new. Not a fair comment, as it was made in 1936, but sadly we’re not in 1936, now are we? You know where the story is going and it seldom strays from the path. Plus it doesn’t cut into the material quite as much as it should.

The acting is decent enough. It’s well paced and performed, and despite familiarity it does have a bit of tension to it. None of which would never have saved it from obscurity, mind you.

Well, further obscurity. It’s not up on anyone’s best of the best list.

What saves the picture and makes it worth looking up is the guy playing the barber. This is Tod Slaughter, ham extraordinaire. The smirks he gives… the laughs he makes… man. He’s something.

Sweeny Todd doesn’t quite let him off the leash. He is much, much more entertaining in the later Crimes in the Dark House. Still, he makes a good showing as the villain and is worth seeking out despite the averageness of the proceedings.